5 Tips To Avoid Burnout - From A Therapist

What Is Burnout?

Burnout is "a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion caused by excessive and prolonged stress" and it's something I help almost all of my clients through, because we all have responsibilities and duties and over time those can wear us down. Feeling overwhelmed and like you never have time to do what you want to do is emotionally taxing. Hell, adulting in itself can be exhausting. Especially if you are healing from trauma or dealing with mental health issues. When you really stop to think about how much of adult life is done without a support system, it's no wonder most people feel exhausted and burned out. While working on systemic issues affecting you are important, they're beyond the scope of this blog post, so I will focus on how energy management can help you.

No matter how strong or capable you are, you are susceptible to burnout. When I talk about burnout, and while you read this post, I want you to think about the things and people that you give your energy to and practice being aware of how those actions are affecting you.

Now, I'm not saying to ditch all your responsibilities and go live in the woods and never speak to anyone again (but hello is that an option because I would love to be known as the cottagecore woman in my area who spends her days vibing with wild animals and gardening), what I am saying is to start practicing being aware of how much it costs you to show up for others in the way that you do. Burnout can be very sneaky, and you may not want to admit that you are feeling burned out, but you probably are and this should help you identify some signs and give you some tools to start feeling better.

You may experience:

Alienation from work-related activities: People who are burned out view their jobs and lives as increasingly stressful and frustrating. You may grow less and less patient and sympathetic to your clients and coworkers. You may distance yourself emotionally, and begin to feel numb or resentful about your work and clients. If you're a service provider or an entrepreneur, this can be one of the first signs. This leads to loneliness, decreased emotional regulation and a desire to just get away. Have you ever wanted to pack all your stuff and move to another city and start over? Yep, that's burnout.

Physical symptoms: Symptoms of chronic stress will show up as systemic inflammation, headaches/migraines, difficulty sleeping, racing thoughts, feeling anxious often, overwhelm, physical pain, irritability. I just recently had a client who threw their back out because they were so overwhelmed for so long, and they weren't listening, so their body decided to shut them down. Your body is smarter than you, and you can't lie to your body. If you are experiencing chronic physical symptoms you are likely burned out.

Emotional exhaustion: Burnout causes people to feel drained, unable to cope, and bones level, soul level tired. It's makes every day a no bones day. If you often lack the energy and desire to get your work done or to do anything that fills your soul, that leads to chronic stress and amplifies physical symptoms - can you see the feedback loop here? One feeds the other and both amplify.

Reduced performance: When you are pissed or exhausted everyday at work and in life, you definitely aren't doing your best work, which... you guessed it, feed the emotional exhaustion and physical symptoms loop. While acute stress can improve performance (think elite athletes), chronic stress - aka burnout - is catabolic, meaning it breaks down your body which limits performance. When people say stress eats you alive, it literally does.

How do we fix burnout?

1. Take more time for you. Take your vacation days and do whatever you want with them. Practice real, sustainable self care. If you aren't able to take a full day off, find pockets throughout your day where you can really intentionally sit and breathe, or go for a short walk. The key here is to do something that feels restful or energizing.

2. Stop working so hard and glorifying busy. I'm obviously not saying that you should be bad at your job, what I mean is you should be doing your best work within your capacity that day. Your best will shift day to day, because your capacity will shift day to day. Do your best and be okay with it.

Glorifying busy is a disease that will take your life along with it, and it's something that is so rewarded in our culture. When you ask someone how they are, don't they usually reply "so busy OMG SO BUSY I AM IMPORTANT AND BUSY," like it's a sin to just chill the fuck out. Hustle culture is killing us! We are working our lives away so we can..... do what exactly? Get validation? Avoid dealing with our problems? Make money we won't enjoy because we are too busy working? NO THANK YOU friend.

3. Prioritize fun - when do you prioritize fun? This means setting boundaries around how you spend your time and energy. What else do we work for if not to make enough to enjoy the rest of our time? If you're not sure what you would even do for fun, think of something you used to enjoy as a kid and go do that.

4. Rest more - unapologetically. Fucking rest. Sleep more. Laze about more. Do nothing more. I promise you that the world will not fall apart and you will not forget how to work if you just take some down time to decompress and breathe.

5. Set boundaries. Set boundaries around your time, energy and attention. If you would be over-loaded by taking on a project or an engagement, say no. If you need more time to rest then say no. If you can only contribute to a certain capacity, say so. Boundaries are going to be your best hedge against burnout. Not sure how to set these, grab Boundaries Baddie and learn how to set them with ease and confidence.

A bonus - practice asking yourself how you are feeling throughout the day. When you regularly check in with yourself, your body has a chance to tell you how you are feeling and to give you feedback. When you learn to listen to your body at a whisper, it won't need to scream to get your attention (like throwing your back out).

Which one of these do you plan to start prioritizing?